Marriage: Rights and Responsibilities of Spouses

Marriage: Rights & Responsibilities of Spouses

1.   Introduction:

Marriage is a blessing and a gift of Allah SWT to humans to fulfil their

desires, find tranquillity and compassion in the company of their spouses."…He created for you mates from among yourselves, that you may dwell in tranquillity with them, and He put love and mercy between your hearts… (Quran 30:21) When husband and wife get married they complete each other, they become a single self. (Hussain) Allah SWT illustrating the closeness of their bond says “…They are clothing for you and you are clothing for them…” (Quran 2:187) In Islam Marriage is enriched with romance and also cater every physical and practical aspect of it too. So for that purpose it has assigned specific roles for both husband and wife to play and also entrusted certain rights and responsibilities to both of them.

2.   Husband’s rights and obligations:

Islam has designated specific rights and obligations to both the spouses. Husbands have a great role to play in the relationship.

In explaining the husband’s obligations Allah SWT said in Quran. “Men are in charge of women by [right of] what Allah has given one over the other…” (Quran 4:34)

The Arabic word used in the verse is “Arrijalu qawwamoonaAAala annisa,” Qawam means “support” or “the one who support.” It means Allah SWT has made husbands a strong pillar of support to their wives.

2.1.              Dowry (Mahr) of his wife:

“And give to the women (whom you marry) their Mahr (obligatory bridal money given by the husband to his wife at the time of marriage) with a good heart…” (Quran 4:4)

2.2.              Obliged to provide for their wives:

Allah SWT made it a duty for husbands to provide provisions and sustenance for their wives. He SWT says in Quran “Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has made one of them to excel the other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means…..” (Quran 4:34)

In another verse He says “…the father of the child shall bear the cost of the mother's food and clothing on a reasonable basis...” (Quran 2:233)

2.3.              Justice between wives:

If a Muslim husband has more the one wife then Allah SWT has ordered his to deal with them justly and be fair with all of them. He says “…But if you fear that you will not be just, then [marry only] one…” (Quran 4:3)

2.4.              Showing Respect, Love and kindness:

Marriage can’t be successful without the respect, love, mercy, kindness

and compassion in the spouses. That is why Islam has laid great stress on this aspect. Husbands are supposed to be kind, loving and compassionate towards their wives. Allah SWT says “And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquillity in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy.”(Quran 30:21) We can learn from Prophet Muhammad ﷺ seerah how kindly he ﷺ used to treat his ﷺ wives. He ﷺ used to play with them and express his ﷺ love towards them. He instructed others also to treat their wives kindly. It is also mentioned in a hadith that the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: "The best of you is the best to his wives, and I am the best of you to my wives…"
(Narrated by Tirmidhi; Hadith: 3895).

2.5.              Responsibility towards her religion:

Islam is the fundamental bond that binds a marriage and keeps a couple from together. So due to its extreme importance it is the duty of husbands to look after their as well as the religion of their wives. The Prophet ﷺ said: “May Allah have mercy on a man who gets up at night and prays, and awakens his wife; if she refuses, he should sprinkle water on her face...” (Sunan Abu-Dawood Hadith 1303)

3.   Wife’s rights and obligations:

It takes two wings to fly, similarly Islam has also provided guidelines for wives ensuring their rights and assigning their due responsibilities.

3.1.              Obedience to the husband:

Obedience to husband is religious duty as well as has many virtues for in both lives. Allah SWT says in Quran “…Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient (to Allah and to their husbands)…” (Quran 4:34) It was asked from Prophet ﷺ “…Which woman is best?' He said: “The one who makes him happy when he looks at her, obeys him when he commands her, and she does not go against his wishes with regard to herself nor her wealth.”  (Sunan an-Nasa'i 3231)

3.2.              Guarding herself and her chastity:

The chastity is what contains the human beings from running after their vile desires. (Aal) So in order to protect and uphold the honour of women, women are ordered to guard their chastity. Allah SWT says in Quran “…Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient (to Allah and to their husbands), and guard in the husband's absence what Allah orders them to guard…” (Quran 4:34)

3.3.              Being available to Husband:

Islam doesn’t negate desire it regulates them. Allah SWT knowing His creation has made it obligatory for wives to make themselves available to their husbands whenever they call so corruption could be avoided. It is narrated in a hadith Prophet ﷺ said “When a man invites his wife to his bed and she does not come, and he (the husband) spends the sight being angry with her, the angels curse her until morning.” (Sahih Muslim 1436)

3.4.              Not to fast without her husband’s consent:

The Prophet ﷺ said, "A woman should not fast (optional fasts) except with her husband's permission if he is at home.” (Sahih al-Bukhari 5192)

3.5.              Not to allow anyone in house without husband’s consent:

“…The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: No woman should observe fast when her spouse is present (in the house) but with his permission. And she should not admit any (mahram) in his house, while he (her husband) is present, but with his permission…” (Sahih Muslim 1026)

4.   Shared rights:

Marriage is a contract devised on the paradigm of rights and responsibilities for everyone. (Misanthrope) Islam has shared rights for both husband and wife to look after. These rights protect both spouses’ needs and help them to focus on getting closer to Allah SWT.

4.1.              Protecting each other from Hell fire:

“O you who have believed, protect yourselves and your families from a Fire” (Quran 66:6)

4.2.              Protecting each other’s religion:

“The Prophet ﷺ said: “May Allah have mercy on a man who gets up at night and prays, and awakens his wife; if she refuses, he should sprinkle water on her face. May Allah have mercy on a woman who gets up at night and prays, and awakens her husband; if he refuses, she would sprinkle water on his face.”” (Sunan Abi Dawud 1308)

 

5.   Consequences of not fulfilling these obligations:

Islam cover marriage as a long lasting institution with specific rights and obligations ascribed to each spouse.  If any of the spouses refuse to fulfil their obligations, there are consequences both in this world and in Akhira. In sharia if any one of the spouses refuses to fulfil their obligations without any reasonable excuse then the other spouse have the right to divorce or annul the marriage. As marriage is a contract an if any party are not true to their obligations then the contract can be dissolved. Shaykh ‘Abd-Allaah ibn‘Abd al-Rahmaan ibn Jibreen says regarding a husband who doesn’t  fulfil his obligations in marriage
“If he deprives of her of her rights of spending on her maintenance, clothing and other essential needs, when he is able to provide these things, then she has the right to ask for khula’.” (Jibreen)

 

6.   Conclusion:
          Main purpose and aim of marriage is to find comfort between the spouses and for each of the spouse to enter Paradise holding each other's hands. It is the most beautiful bond between spouses. For the purpose of making any marriage successful and long lasting Islam has assigned certain rights and responsibilities to both spouses. Fulfilment to these obligations brings contentment peace and tranquillity in their lives. In view of Islam spouses should be coolness of each other’s eyes and hearts. Allah SWT say's 

“And those who say, "Our Lord, grant us from among our wives and offspring comfort to our eyes and make us an example for the righteous." (Quran 25:74)

  

Bibliography

Aal, Sheikh Husayn ibn Abdul Aziz. Importance of Chastity and the Perils of Zina. 13 July 2001. Web. 24 June 2016. <http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthread.php?292272-Importance-of-Chastity-and-the-Perils-of-Zina>.

Hussain, Irshaad. MARRIAGE IN ISLAM. 10 AUGUST 2003. Web. 24 June 2016. <http://www.islamfrominside.com/Pages/Articles/Marriage%20in%20Islam.html>.

Jibreen, Shaykh ‘Abd-Allaah ibn ‘Abd al-Rahmaan ibn. Fiqh of the family » Khul (divorce instigated by the wife). 23 July 1998. Web. 24 June 2016. <https://islamqa.info/en/1859>.

Misanthrope, The. Muslim Marriage: Husbands, Know Your Rights. 22 April 2010. Web. 24 June 2016.